Friday, November 16, 2007

What am I to learn?

I am a child of education. I love learning. I love learning about my job and how to do it better. I love learning about agriculture. I love learning about 17th century roman history. I love learning a new recipe. I love learning about things I could really care less about. I love to learn for learning sake.

But I have come to the realization over this last month that the Lord is trying to teach me...and I am a stubborn and unmotivated student. I think about the apostles. They soaked up the Lords teaching. They were punished and threatened, all because they trusted in their teacher. I am not so good. I really don't like to be disowned and threatened. And yet, I am forced to believe that when road blocks come my way, there is a reason for them, and the Lord is trying to teach me something in it.

I have been meditating on this tiny scripture that I found in Proverbs (24:32) that wasn't even the point of the lesson I was studying...but here it is:
"I applied my heart to what I observed and learned a lesson from what I saw."
I need to be diligent about this. When circumstanes come my way, I have to believe that I am to learn something in this that will help me to manifest the holy spirit within and help me to act accordingly.

I am not a good student here, but I hope that I am learning.

"Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good spirit lead me on level ground" Ps 143.10

And a prayer request:
I have been alone all fall it feels like. Mark forgot (after he got home on Tuesday) that he had to fly to Alanta on Thursday. And I just now heard that he will be gone for our Ag Ed Christmas party that is at OUR house (I didn't know about that trip either). I have come, in the almost two years since we have been married, to depend on him and I feel single again! I am not sure what the Lord is trying to teach me in this, but would you, dear sweet friend, pray that I get it figured out? Pray that I can do all this without Mark.
Thanks friends!

2 comments:

Lindsay said...

The Lord will give you the strength, patience and understanding you need to get through this.
I feel "single" a lot of the time... especially during harvest... but I've come to view, and look back at the "single times" as times of huge growth, more dependence on God, and a maturing of my spirit.
It's not easy. I still struggle and get angry at times... but I make it through... knowing that God is making and molding me into the woman/wife/mother He intended me to be.

Seek Him as you have been... meditate on that verse from Psalm 143... and continue to ask for prayer. :)

Love to you today - enjoy the weeekend!!

KayDee said...

Application -- that is my downfall. Love learning, but am not as quick to APPLY it to my life. Totally hear what you are saying.

Will keep you in prayer, dear one.